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Bobi Gephart hadn’t planned to go to church that Sunday—not the worship service the pastor had planned to make a confession about the oppressive secret he had been carrying for so long.
But she quickly changed her mind and realized that she couldn’t count on the priest – the man she said began sexually hunting her when she was young – to share the whole truth.
In the middle of the service, Gephart rushed to New Life Christian Church & World Outreach in Warsaw, Indiana and made sure his story was told.
Nearly one million viewers witnessed what happened next in this conflict on May 22, was videotaped and posted on Facebook.
John B. Lowe II, long-time pastor of the congregation, admitted that he “fornicated” on stage 20 years ago. “I sinned,” he said, admitting that he had never publicly admitted it before “to protect myself.”
Watching from the congregation, Bobi and his wife Nate Gephart then took the stage and took the microphone.
“If you love us, please let’s talk,” Nate said, handing the microphone to his wife.
He said it’s 27 years, not 20, “living in a prison of lies and shame.”
“For years I thought I was a terrible person, I thought I was suicidal, I didn’t realize what had really been done to me, that I was a victim,” she said. “I was only 16 when you took my virginity on the office floor. Remember that? I know you did.”
“You kept me in your prison,” he told Lowe, but “I am no longer a prisoner.”
Bobi Gephart, now 43, told The Associated Press that he wanted the church community to know the truth and that he didn’t think the video recorded by a family member in the congregation would spark such a viral backlash. He said he received “overwhelming support”.
“I didn’t know how helpful that was and how it would help people,” she said. “People from all over the world, not just in this region, reach out to me. Their stories are so heartbreaking.”
The church said on May 23 that Lowe had resigned as pastor. The church said no one on the staff knew what had happened before, and offered Gephart assistance with “healing in every way possible”.
At church service on May 29, Lowe’s son, vice pastor Bryan Lowe, read a statement saying the church would be restructured and held meetings with members.
The Indiana State Police said in a statement that anyone with “knowledge as a victim or witness” about the situation should contact investigators.
Bobi Gephart said he spoke to police but acknowledged that Lowe’s prosecution was unlikely, given the passage of time and Indiana law defining the age of sexual consent as 16. He said he was aware of other past abuses at the church.
He said Lowe began “grooming” before the age of 16, where a sexual predator gains the victim’s trust through favors and other means. Sexual intercourse continued until her early 20s. Lowe, now 65, was 20 years older than him.
Gephart said that from his youth his family’s life “revolved around the church and Lowes”.
“We were like a family with them,” he said, and one parent would usually keep an eye on the kids while the other was traveling.
He said that few people in the church knew what had happened, but that it remained a mystery to most of the congregation, and no one helped him seek counselling. She said she felt obligated to protect the dignity of the priest and the church, and that she had not even told her husband.
Recently, things have changed when her brother tells her that she is haunted by a memory from her teenage years. He said he remembers seeing the priest in bed with his younger sister, his shirt and underwear.
When she told him what had happened, he said that his brother immediately confronted Lowe and urged him to resign.
He said Lowe started talking to some people at church, confessing to adultery, but didn’t tell the whole story.
The church set up an advisory committee and in a later statement advised that it had not finished the investigation, failed to confirm the veracity of Lowe’s version, and advised him not to make the May 22 confession.
Ages of consent in US states range from 16 to 18.
Victim advocates say such sexual acts by clergy go beyond “adultery”, which means consent between equals. They say it means an abuse of power by a spiritual authority. Some denominations, such as the Catholic Church, define sexual abuse by clergy as involving any victim under the age of 18.
New Life is an independent church.
After Bobi Gephart confronted Lowe at the ceremony, Nate Gephart threw a necklace Lowe gave Bobi onto the podium, followed by the “ring of covenant purity” that many churches give to young people to encourage their virginity before marriage.
“We work through love and forgiveness,” Nate said. “But people have to be held accountable and they can’t deceive people and say, ‘Well, I just committed adultery. It was far beyond adultery. Here the ring of covenant purity is back. I don’t want him in my house.”
Some in the congregation voiced their support for the couple and questioned Lowe, who admitted that Bobi was 16 when intercourse began. Later, some turned around him in prayer.
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Religious publications from the Associated Press are supported by AP’s collaboration with The Conversation US and funding from Lilly Endowment Inc. Only AP is responsible for this content.
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